How not to succeed at a long Memorial Day weekend in Kansas City:

  1. Don’t go to Martini Corner on Friday night for 6 hours and drink $2.50 Pacificos.
  2. Don’t go to your friend’s house on Saturday for games, BBQ, and drinking.
  3. Don’t spend Sunday at your friend’s pool getting hammered, then drink espresso, then go to Martini Corner again.